The End of Innocence

[The italics indicate that I'm stealing this from somewhere. You should be able to figure out from where, though.]

Now, this is when I know I'm in a bad neighborhood, you only see this in the worst neighborhoods. Remember, this was 3 o'clock in the morning. I looked out the window, and there was a fucking baby standing on the corner. And the baby didn't even look scared, he was just standing there. And it made me sad, you know, because I wanted to help the baby. I was like, "Mm mm, I don't trust you either. Click! The old baby-on-the-corner trick, eh? Not gonna fall for that shit."

As time goes by, I start feeling worse. I was like, "What the hell is wrong with me, I'm scared of a baby! But this baby could be in trouble, he may need my help. I gotta do something." But I wasn't gonna get out of the car. I'm serious, man. I just cranked the window open a little bit. "Hey baby! Baby, go home, man! It's 3 o'clock in the morning man, what the fuck are you doing up?"

The baby says, "I'm selling weed!"

"Hey, baby! Stop selling weed, all right, you've got your whole life ahead of you."

He goes, "Fuck you, I got kids to feed!"